Time Keeps On Ticking….

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Filling my days with activity of some sort makes me feel better than spending an entire day on the couch watching the “boob tube.” There are “maintenance” chores that are required in recovery and in my life. In order to maintain my recovery I need to attend meetings, talk with others in the Program, pray, and be of service to others and to the Fellowship. To maintain my home I need to clean and organize my stuff, on a daily basis. To maintain myself I need to eat nutritional food, see my doctor regularly, exercise as often as I can manage. I need to have purpose and direction in my life – and that is no one’s job but mine. I can give myself a day “off” once in a while, but I do feel better at the end of the day when I have been of use to others, when I have accomplished something – be it small or large. I am grateful for all who populate my world, including strangers who sometimes affect me in some manner. I thank the God of my understanding for the blessing of recovery, it has truly taught me the benefits of sobriety, and has given me a “place” in this world. I am right where God wants me to be.



Choosing anonymity in the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous means learning how to put the principles before my personality. It means that the spiritual principles behind each of the Twelve Steps are so much more important than my ego, regardless of my service to the Program. It is always more important that I learn to give freely of myself, without commendation, pats on the back, or other forms of ego massaging. What is important is learning to give of myself freely, and understanding the humility that is encouraged in each of us. No one is more important than the “group,” no one is more important than the Steps of the Program, and no one is more important than the Spiritual Principles. It does not matter what services I endeavor to give, it does not matter what “role” I play in my Fellowship – nothing is more important than “the group.” I am only one among many. What I do is far more important than who I am. Who I am is simply: “Bonnie, alcoholic.”

But wait, there’s more….


We have all experienced times of waiting: doctor’s offices, traffic jams, promotions, and checkout lines. At those times, we have nothing to do but wait for our turn. (Likey or no likey). It was suggested to me to work on my patience. Every time, I visited a large box store I would seek out the largest line to wait in. This self-homework assignment required a full quantity of humility, patience, and courage. Within a week or so, I was comfortable with this action item. I began to see the world around me with newer eyes. I viewed a small child sneaking a candy bar into his pants. I observed several couples in harmony with each other. I even watched versions of myself in line, not likey the waiting and being verbally abusive to employee’s and fellow customers. I began to understand how my Creator waits on me and how I must wait on his perfect timing. His timing is totally different than my version. It is I that leaves early or comes late. Daily, I strive to become more dependent on Him. It’s a simple not always easy matter of trust.

Today is a good day to Work At It Today.

Reflection AND Photo courtesy of CLAY(thank you)

Reflection AND Photo courtesy of CLAY(thank you)



I give of myself to others and receive no less than the blessing of sobriety for it. While I can take no credit for the sobriety of others, I can and do claim the sobriety I get from others. It’s kind of circular, when you think of it . . . and yet it is also individualism at it’s highest point. Being a friend to others has its own rewards, as keeping busy leaves me little time for self-absorption, and selfish thinking. If I can focus my mind on helping another alcoholic, staying sober comes more readily to me. This philosophy can be confusing – I work to eliminate my selfishness, and yet learning to give of myself requires selfishness because I need to work on my recovery. If I am not here to be of service to others – no one will benefit, including me.

Oh To Be Kind


It takes very little to be kind to others – and I believe the world would be a much better place if kindness was a common practice. But, as I know, I am not in charge of the world. Being kind to others who have not been kind to me provides me with very good lessons on being spiritually fit, and emotionally mature. If I can rise above my old ways of treating people, and work towards being kind to others because it is the right thing to do – I will be a better person for it. The Program teaches me this, and my Higher Power, continues to remind me that giving comes from the heart, not the brain.



I keep a small notebook where I write things said at meetings that grab me. Here are some.

“Letting anger dominate you, letting fear dominate you in any growing process, is like building a brick wall around you.”

“What I used to medicate the pain with, became the pain.”

“Forgive yourself before you can forgive others.”

“There are no greener pastures for me than the journey I’m on.”

Photo and Reflection courtesy of MAGGS via the Berlin Wall ♥

Photo and Reflection courtesy of MAGGS via the Berlin Wall ♥

Lessons In Humility


I am grateful for the “living amends” that has enabled me to make amends to many whom I have forgotten. Today I work to be of service to my community, and to those who are in my life. Amends is something that will continue in my life, for the rest of my life. It is an opportunity to examine my own behavior and to claim what is truly mine. Making amends is another “tool” in recovery, but it is so much more than merely saying “I’m sorry,” it is an opportunity to make right some of the wrongs in my life. It is also a means of learning and accepting the reality of my behavior towards others. The Program is amazing, it is constantly teaching me new ways of viewing my life, and how I behave towards others. Slowly I am learning how to love and care for others, and through that process have learned to love and care for myself. I just need to be mindful of all the lessons available to me. I will find these lessons if I just keep my eyes, my heart, and my mind open to the blessings and teachings of my Higher Power.

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