Selfishness, pride, fear, greed, and materialism. Selfishness was one area that I can clearly see in my past behavior, it was always about “me” regardless of what event or situation I encountered. Pride was a big block for me, as I lacked the education that supports such false pride. I became defensive and blocked God out of my life out of a misguided notion that He was responsible for what I viewed as a lack of brain power. I knew just enough to be arrogant and rude. Now, through education and the willingness to learn, I have reached a place where I know that we each have our place in the world, be that as an educator, or as a student. Recovery has taught me to be open and willing to all forms of knowledge and education. Fear has always been a driving force for me; I have heard it said that fear is the result of not getting what you want or losing something you already have. I can relate to that statement – I have done a lot of living in fear, and being driven by fears – but – I have learned that fear is the absence of faith-and even going through complete devastation regarding my job situation, thankfully I have been blessed with a strong faith – and fully believe in the spirit of a Higher Power. I am no longer driven by a hundred nameless fears. Greed and materialism really feed off of each other, and while I like my comforts they are no longer the major motivators of my life. I am comfortable with what I have and do not aspire to bigger and better constantly, as I once did. I am learning to rid myself of the negative behaviors and to breathe new life into the positive ones. This is possible through my Higher Power, and the Program of A.A

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