Step 10 seems to be the step that I’ve neglected most frequently over the years. When things are going well (my way) and I’m comfortable I have simply neglected this. Usually though my character defects will slip back into my daily living and before long I find that I’m uncomfortable with my sobriety one more time. Sometimes it can be as simple as something that I hear in a meeting or in a conversation but I become aware that once again I’ve reacted based on fear, or judged another persons motives and once again it is time to put the pen to paper and “get down to causes and conditions” As the big book says; “Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment and fear. When these crop up, we ask God to remove them. We discuss them with someone else immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone.” The important thing I have to remember is that it says when these crop up not if these crop up.

So generally I take the inventory and talk to another alcoholic then make the amends in that order. Then I generally end up back at step 6 & 7 looking for the willingness to let God remove the defects of character that continue to plague my relationships. Then I ask Him to show me a better way of reacting.

Generally by the time I’ve gone through this process I can ask the question “Am I grateful?” and the answer is yes, and possibly a little bit more humble as well.