Remaining Grounded

At some point in my sobriety I learned that maintaining serenity would require moderating the ups and downs of my emotions. The old timers told me that controlling my excitement and over-elation would automatically lead to fewer emotional valleys. At first this seemed inherently wrong, like artificially dampening my normal enthusiasm. But there was nothing “normal” about my emotions. They were all over the map and capable of ambushing me from left and right at the worst possible times. AA offered me some tools to start getting emotionally grounded. One of them was the phrase “this too shall pass.” I learned to say these words to myself when Snoopy was doing his dance in my head because of some good news or accolade that had come my way. By telling my self “this too shall pass,” I was not killing my own buzz, I was simply cautioning myself, “easy does it.” Once I associated the manic highs with the painful crashes that inevitably followed, it was easier to tame the over-excitement. When the lows came, I would whisper to myself all the encouragement I had learned in the Program: “this too shall pass,” “progress not perfection,” and “one day at a time.” All these forms of self-care have become easier over time. When I recall how fragile my emotional state was during active alcoholism and early recovery, I think of being a “candle in the wind”. But I have kept coming back to AA, and that has given me the opportunity to stay strong and centered.


10 thoughts on “Remaining Grounded

  1. My soul rests with you, my Anamchara.

    You might recall I was reflecting yesterday on the feeling of being in a spiritual wilderness or a dry place and specifically identified “my grumpiness”.
    I find that lots of times when I start a reflection one day it lingers on in my mind and is working towards a resolution so this certainly is not in conformity with what I identified as being a primary problem. I certainly know it is not because God is not with me for I am thoroughly indoctrinated with faith having seen repeated instances of God’s presence.

    So what is it?

    What is the resolution of my supposed dilemma?

    There is a high probability of it being expression of my own neuroticism which exists on a continuum from low degree to high and speaks with feelings of confidence, insecurity, fear, faith, hope, love…… It all boils down to faith and whether it is present in sufficient manifestation to be felt in my heart.

    I can’t.
    God can!
    I think I’ll let him!!

    I’m Harry, grateful alcoholic and devoted 12th stepper. – Georgia, US of A.

  2. I can relate to this topic and thanks for bring it up. I can get “addicted” to drama especially at work and have to constantly remind myself to steer clear of ongoing conflicts between coworkers.

  3. Kt here, when I look at my past and all of the things, the what ifs, should haves, could haves and why me, I have to laugh, and say I sure waisted alot of time fussing over this and that. Now I am more aware of those character defects, but I still need t o stay vigilant iny aa program to assure the fact that I can continue to live each day one day at a time without resentment fear, and continue to ask hp for guidance about thy will not mine. Thanks SMB for a great share.

  4. To remain grounded, I have to address fear. There are multiple things to be afraid of in the course of my day. But, as one wise sponsor told me, “a decision based on fear only leads to greater fear as a consequence.”

  5. Top of the morning family,
    What I pay attention to-grows.
    As a song I heard the other day, nothing from nothing leads to nothing.
    Today is good day to appreciate the time I spend alone with Him.
    Heading up to the high country for some moutain biking in the snow.

    It’s a good day to expereince the freedom that Divine Mercy has blessed me with.

  6. Yes, a “candle in the wind”.
    So I pray each morning to be shown the way.
    Of kindliness, tolerance, patience and love.
    Knowing I lack the strength by myself to withstand the wind, but with Him my
    light can be useful.
    So when the breeze builds, and the perky little flame starts to dance and flickering shadows appear, it’s time to ask for His help.
    Grateful for the Gift

  7. Great post, you gave me an aha moment.
    I always have very high highs and low lows. On a high day I will realize I start to feel out of control and I know I will fall off of the cloud soon enough. It makes me feel better that I can tell myself “this too shall pass” during the highs, and be ok with that, instead of hoping that they will last forever and being let down. I always thought the saying was only for bad things to pass. Thank you for sharing!

    Emily, grateful alcoholic

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