Character Building

(Reflection courtesy of KT)

Demands made upon other people for too much at- tention, protection, and love can only invite domina- tion or revulsion. . . .
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 44

As I read the daily reflections this morning, I was reminded that I used to think that seeking approval could not be part of a character defect as I was seeking to make people happy, no harm right???
Well today after realizing more and more this need to be ok in the eyes of others is very deep seated and needs constant check and balances in my program of recovery. One good thing is that I no longer need to bend myself like a pretzel to fit into someones ideas, I can state my position better to people without indignation.
God, or HP, help me search out the blocks and barriers within myself. Bring what I need to know into my conscious mind, so I can be free of it. Show me what I need to know about myself.

Photo and reflection courtesy of Tom R
Photo courtesy of Tom R
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10 thoughts on “Character Building

  1. I practice a program of recovery which is a spiritual pathway and step 10 in this program declares; “”Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it””. There is no vagueness in the word and process; “”Continued””.

    I’m Harry, grateful alcoholic and devoted 12th stepper.

    • PS I certainly did very little of this before coming into Alcoholics Anonymous and the auspices of the 12 step program.

  2. Good catching up n sorry i havent been around so much but I’m here today.
    Tis a great reflection Kt. I think we all have a need for approval and affirmation from other people. It comes with that natural instinctual desire for social interaction. We all need love and security but today I tend to lean on my gratitude fo what he’s done for me and how much he loves me rather than other very flawed people. if I put them on a pedestal, I will be very disappointed when i find out they lie, steal and manipulate for their own needs as much as any. even the pastors I know can show entitlement at times and superiority then be totally selfish with their time or materials. I’m human and i like it, tired of playing God. Dan grateful alcohlic.

  3. Top of the morning family,
    That be the good stuff KT. Thank you for the reflection.
    RE: “ Bring what I need to know into my conscious mind, so I can be free of it. Show me what I need to know about myself.”

    The steps are His message to us. A direction for us to see what we don’t see about ourselves. We I’m implementing, “WOH” my new eyes/heart are open to my spiritual and emotional blind spots. He has my biscuits protected, Divine Mercy shelters me from my human blind spots. This order of living shows us/ brings us our character weaknesses, which needs to be adjusted or just completely removed.

    Its a good day to have a good day.

  4. This is just my experience.
    I was lost and battered and confused.
    I met you guys and I was made welcome.
    As I began to sense that I was indeed safe, protected and had intrinsic value (these were new sensations for me), I eventually began to actually practice the principles you showed me were working for you. Doesn’t matter exactly why; I probably can’t even articulate it, but I did.
    Things began to change and so did I.
    I got softer, a wee bit helpful and a lot more interested in things outside myself.
    I felt respect and I gave respect; I felt compassion and I returned compassion.
    As I felt compassion, I reciprocated, silently, in my heart.
    As I felt respected, I in turn, returned it, again, wordlessly.
    I came into communion with my brothers and sisters.
    I was beginning to sense the unseen world and the hand of the eternal, the divine, of love.
    I could feel His light within me.
    Grateful for the Gift

  5. Wasn’t my constant need to “fit in” based on fear? This fear was that hole in my soul that I attempted to fill with booze. I just wish I could tell my boss what I REALLY think about him. LOL

  6. Thanks for your shares, readers of this 24. To me it is like a meeting. Sharing experience strength and hope.
    I am kt grateful alcoholic

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