Me and You

Honesty was a big step for me – for without it, recovery was a moot point. I soon discovered that I had a lot of fear behind my lies – fear of rejection, fear of ridicule, fear of embarrassment, and fear of being laughed at or just flat out snubbed by others. Plus there was a lot of denial in my lies – denial of my disease, denial of my past life, denial of who I was and my true life. Coming to know the real me was my first task in the recovery process.

Right along with this honesty and self-awareness came a true sense of serenity, something I had not experienced before. It was so new to me that I did not recognize it for that, until someone else pointed it out to me. I felt like there was a chance for me to have a life that made a difference. I began to come to terms with my demons and felt hope for the first time. I was so excited that I wanted to share the Program with everyone, but my sponsor advised me to focus on my recovery, not the recovery of others. I soon learned that my best effort towards recovery needed to be focused on me – that later I would serve as an example to others of what sobriety and recovery can look like, both negative AND positive!!!
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5 thoughts on “Me and You

  1. Perhaps I should make a gratitude list.
    Perhaps I should live my life as well as I can and perfect gratitude.
    I’m Harry, grateful alcoholic and devoted 12th stepper.
    .
    “Live your life with purpose. Focus on your blessings, not your misfortunes. Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses. Be yourself and don’t wait for the approval of others. But most importantly, have a positive and humble mindset no matter what situation you are in. Count your blessings, not your problems, and you will realize how beautiful your life truly is.” — Troy Amdahl

    http://simplereminders.com/20160414012559.html

  2. Yes, we’re learning that painful and disappointing things happen, often for a reason and a higher purpose. Yes, these things often work out for good. But we don’t have to spend so much time and energy figuring out the purpose and plan for each detail of our life. That’s hypervigilence!

    I love the word hypervigilence, I also like the advice in language of letting go, just go about our business, try not to take things personal. That helps me in recovery. Let go let God.

  3. The Big Book charts a vivid, vigorous course for personal change and growth. It is simple, direct, and precise. The Program’s transforming power is linked with its simplicity. A.A.’s message promises healing and wholesomeness for any alcoholic who will pay the price. The price is simply to accept the help that will save our lives. In the process A.A. gives us everything we really want but could never find anywhere else.

  4. Wonderful reflection…
    “Coming to know the real me”
    Would not have had a clue about that…one of those too painful, too hard, denial writ large kinds of things…
    So if I don’t know who or what I truly am, then how can I expect anybody else to?
    If all I am is an ongoing series of reactions to self centred emotions, then there’s not a solid foundation to build upon…you showed me that as I began to rely upon certain principles, and took certain actions, that ” I” began to gain definition and character and inner strength. Affection for that which “I Am”, mirroring the divine within, began to manifest itself in my heart.
    I need not wander away from truth in an alcohol fog any longer.
    Grateful for the Gift

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