The Winds Of Change

Accepting the fact of change was something I struggled with for many years. I acknowledge that change is inevitable, and desirable in many instances. I have changed from being an absolute crazy person, one who was constantly in a state of change in the hopes of “mastering” my disease. I tried everything I could think of to control my drinking – and it all worked well, until that first drink – then all my determination went out the window. Time and again, my “plan” would backfire on me, and once again I would awaken to another hangover, another morning of trying to remember just what I had done the night before. I was on a fast track leading nowhere for many years. When I began my journey to the tables, I welcomed change, I wanted it badly, and knew that change was the only pathway to recovery. I began by learning what I later came to know as some of the Spiritual Principles; such as patience, open-mindedness, honesty, humility and a willingness to change, to grow, and to become as God desired me to be. Do you struggle with change?

Photo courtesy of Soto
Photo courtesy of Soto
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11 thoughts on “The Winds Of Change

  1. “It is not for a good work that we are going to stone you, but for blasphemy, because you, though only a human being, are making yourself God.” – John 10: 33

    I was recently irritated with someone because they were doing this thing that always irritates me. It is their not-so-hidden awful failing.

    Then, in an odd burst of humility, I asked myself, “Do I ever do the thing for which I have now charged, tried and condemned my friend?” And the answer was, “Absolutely.” Chagrined, my spiritual blood pressure plunged. I felt my irritation quotient go down, and my compassion quotient go up.

    Jesus’ antagonists here in the Gospel of John were deeply pissed, so much so that they were ready to stone him. His big sin, in their view, was blasphemy, acting like he was God.

    I wonder if what they really hated about him was the very thing they were guilty of. At least they acted like deciding what God could do was their job.

    Next time you’re going for a stone to let someone have it with your righteous judgment, step back and ask yourself, “Do I ever do this thing they are doing that is driving me nuts?”

    If the answer is “yes,” consider working on your own stuff, and leaving that other person to God.

    Prayer

    Help me to sweep my side of the street, to work on changing the one person I am responsible for. Amen. — Written by Anthony Robinson

    http://www.ucc.org/daily_devotional_when_someone_pisses_you_off

    Whenever I point my finger at someone there are 3 fingers pointing back at me and one finger pointing upwards towards a better purpose (God)

    I’m Harry, grateful alcoholic and devoted 12th stepper.

  2. When I was actively drinking, nothing changed. I would wake up full of remorse and fear. Throw up, jump in the shower, and promise to never drink again. In the afternoon I would start to feel better and I would decide to have my last drink. And so on. I quit almost every day but nothing changed. When when the consequences caught up with me I was fearful of an uncertain future. But my life has changed for the better. So now I embrace change although sometimes I do still feel it. I have the tools of the program and my fellow members of AA to help me cope. Nothing changes if nothing changes.

  3. On the deeply personal plane, I am finally at the end of a long struggle with an illness that required serious surgery about two months ago. While the prognosis appears good, the remnants of the surgery have my very disciplined, rigorous and life-giving exercise routine somewhat compromised, and my doctor is still encouraging me to take the very strong pain medicine he has prescribed. I love that medicine; I hate that medicine. For the last five or six days, I have taken the bare minimum several afternoons, none at all others, convinced that it’s time to move on without it, pain or no. Still, I have open-ended access for many months, an encouraging doctor who knows of my spiritual sickness with alcohol, an exercise regimen that is far easier on the hooch than not.

    So change isn’t theoretical, but a matter of flushing those pills down the toilet and opting to deal with real pain in a different manner. Only when the metaphysical pain of not changing exceeds the pain of changing will I change. It’s a spiritual axiom as surely as pain being the touchstone of all spiritual growth. Wonder what I’ll do….

  4. Top of the morning family,
    How do I change? One choice at a time.
    If I want a life worth living, I need action to live a life worth living.
    Jack, front site on target / pain is an great motivator!

    A whole lifetime geared to self-centeredness cannot be set in reverse all at once. Rebellion dogs our ever step at first. 12&12 Step Seven, p.73

    The biggest adjustment/choice relates to our belief system. Either God is or isn’t. Either His omnipotent power or self’s power of propulsion. Either my thinking must match Divine Mercy’s or my thinking aligns with the world’s influences. Either His plan, purpose, and direction take precedence or I want my ism- expectations and/or living up to the expectations of others.
    Our choices/actions speak our language of the heart.
    At every step, it’s Divine Mercy who initiates.

    Something good will happen today…

  5. Blue skies smilin’ at me
    Nothin’ but blue skies do I see
    Bluebirds singin’ a song
    Nothin’ but bluebirds all day long

    Never saw the sun shinin’ so bright
    Never saw things goin’ so right
    Noticing the days hurrying by
    When you’re in love, my how they fly

    Blue days, all of them gone
    Nothin’ but blue skies from now on

    thanx bonnie for recycling that old photo.
    brings back warm memories.
    keep trudging my friends

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