Like many members I grew up with a flawed view of what it means to live a spiritual life. I saw many instances where people said one thing, and yet did another. So, to say I was a little confused was just the “tip” of the iceberg for me. I truly believed that being spiritual meant living by a set of rules that were established centuries ago, and really had little to no relevance in today’s world. The thought of adhering to spiritual principles scared me, as I had failed that course of action years ago. But there was “something” in the rooms that kept me coming back. Today I know it was the “spirit” of my Higher Power. The concept of a Higher Power was something that I could relate to – this “power” helped me to find sobriety, and I could also see it at work in the lives of others in the rooms of A.A. There were many in the meetings that had “long term sobriety,” which, to me, meant they had found a power greater than their disease. I wanted this “power” to stop drinking, to live a life with purpose and direction, a life where I could hold my head up and look others in the eye, and know that I, too, am but a child of God. That with all my faults and defects, I am still a valid human being. With the help of A.A. and God, I am capable of great change. Little did I know of my capacity for change. Today I recognize it as a thirst for order and serenity. Recovery is a process which entails many changes, growth and a spiritual awakening unlike anything I ever experienced before.