As this is the 9th month, our Fellowship concentrates on the 9th step “Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.”

When I survey my drinking days, I recall many people whom my life touched casually, but whose days I troubled through my anger and sarcasm. These people are untraceable, and direct amends to them are not possible. The only amends I can make to those untraceable individuals, the only “changes for the better” I can offer, are indirect amends made to other people, whose paths briefly cross mine. Courtesy and kindness, regularly practiced, help me to live in emotional balance, at peace with myself. How do YOU make amends to those who are untraceable?



4 thoughts on “Amends

  1. I received a calling, a calling to a lifework in the healing arts.
    I received a similar calling, a 12th step calling to carry the message of healing and hope found in Alcoholics Anonymous to other alcoholics and it is extended towards every living person.

    In my continuing 10th step inventory I acknowledged that quite often I fell short of being one hundred percent present to each and every person I was to be helpful to simply because I was so often preoccupied or in other words obsessed with the thought of drinking alcohol that it was virtually impossible.
    So my process of making amends for this is to always be kind and considerate, patient and understanding.
    I know this is a tall order and a lofty pursuit but goal setting has a positive sway.

    It all begins with a desire for sobriety in all its glory.

    I’m Harry, grateful alcoholic and devoted 12th stepper.

  2. …eventually it dawned on me that I could attempt to be a light, in the darkness.
    As I came into the present moment, being aware of what was around me, I could be became useful; I could be redeemed, for that moment…
    Grateful for the Gift

  3. to me the key word is “SUCH”
    not only do I make direct amends to the people on my step 8 list, but to all people similar to those. In other words stop all of the behaviours that caused the amend to be necessary. keep trudging my fellow alkies.

  4. Top of the morning family,
    RE: How do YOU make amends to those who are untraceable? Does that include facebook? hehehehe
    It is written: “For where two or three have gathered together, God is there in their midst.”
    This keystone battle rhythm has worked for me; moreover, when to do so would injure them and/or others. As my well’er tells me often. We have started the 9th step, it’s very unlikely that we shall complete this step in this life.

    What areas of my life are closed off?
    – Family
    – Self
    – Society
    – You
    – Divine Mercy
    When I’m willing(?1?!), to make amends, those areas will open up again. I no longer have to painstakingly avoid them.
    BLUF, (bottom line up front) My actions will always speak louder than my words

    “Living one day at a time,
    Enjoying one moment at a time,
    Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace.”

    It’s a good day to have a useful day.

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