The Benefits

There are many benefits to recovery. Sometimes I don’t see them in myself until I look at where I was when I first came through the doors, and compare that to where I am today. I believe I would not be sitting here writing to you, were it not for the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous. I believe I would not be here, at all.  When I arrived at the doors, over 22 years ago, I was desperate to connect to others in some way, other than returning to the insanity of drinking. The warmth of the welcome I received gave me hope and kept me returning to the rooms. I came looking for a way out of the misery that defined my life. What I found was a roomful of people with the same aspirations as me. When I heard others share about their road to recovery, I realized that I had found a whole group of people who I could relate to. We shared a path that led to the tables, and to the hope of recovery from the disease of alcoholism. I had secrets, however.  Grief from childhood, and abuse from a family member. Something I had NEVER told a soul. These dark secrets held me prisoner, just like alcohol. Relapse happened, but it doesn’t need to be part of recovery. My will and my life were held hostage by the very things I thought I was saving the world from. On July 4th, I asked for help and sought through prayer, counseling and working with a new sponsor, to be free at last. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, Diabetes, and now Diverticulitis, which needs to be taken care of with surgery. But I KNOW all will be ok. As I took a complete 4th step, and 5th step with my counselor, I have NEVER felt such relief. The obsession was lifted and I can sleep at night. The GREATEST benefit to sobriety is loving myself enough to stay sober for as long as I live. There is so much more to share….One Day……at a time.

used_10_step_ladder1

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “The Benefits

  1. The gaunt prospector minds a limitless lode.

    Thank the Lord for this day and for all that is in it.
    My times are in his hand.
    My soul rests with him, my Anamchara.

    Thank you Lord for this day and for all that is in it.
    My times are in your hand.
    My soul rests with you, my Anamchara.

    The first prayer is declaratory.
    The second is just as intimate as I can get.

    Why do I have to do this every morning?

    Because I have to or because I want to?

    At first I had to because I was desperate to stay sober.

    I’m not so fragile anymore and now I want to!

    I’m Harry, grateful alcoholic and devoted 12 stepper.

  2. This is from a little card my dear sponsor who passed away several years ago gave me when I got serious about working the steps thoroughly. This card reminds me of why and how I drank.

    I drank for happiness and became unhappy
    I drank for joy and became miserable
    I drank for sociability and became argument I’ve
    I drank for sophistication and became obnoxious
    I drank for friendship and made enemies
    I drank for sleep and woke up tired
    I drank for strength and felt weAK
    I drank for relaxation and got the shakes
    I drank for courage and became afraid
    I drank for confidence and became doubtful
    I drank to make conversation easier and slurred my speech
    I drank to feel heavenly and ended up feeling like hell.

    Written by longtime member of aa.

  3. Some lovely reflective and nuanced stuff today…much to dwell upon to advantage.
    A wee thought goes through my mind.
    This moment, within which I dwell, contains all of my aliveness. It must, for I certainly can’t be alive in what has already happened, nor that which has not yet occurred.
    Yet my mind is typically occupied with either of those past/ future constructs.
    Thus I deny myself the actual gift of being alive, sensing my connected presence with You, God, the Earth and Reality.
    As I mature in sobriety I become more capable of intentionally and,as a matter of choice, participating in Present, more free, more useful and, actually more joyful.
    And I just came here to learn how to drink like a gentleman…
    Grateful for the Gift

  4. Top of the cold Colorado morning family,
    RE:I look at where I was when I first came through the doors, and compare that to where I am today.
    This distance is called action. My faith has stretched farther than I can comprehend.
    As my Drill Sergeant would bellow: I’ll show you how to march, eat, sleep, shoot and communicate, and he’ll even show my how to use the bathroom….
    As Divine Mercy desires for me: He’ll show me where to go, what to say, how to make decisions. He’ll also reveal to me when self’s azimuth is showing me the wrong direction. God also warns me of the consequences of continuing in the wrong direction. “pain is a good motivator.”
    His truth is reality. He has promised His word. When I believe, trust, and obey my life is transformed into peace and freedom. Not a bad deal. And its free, I can afford free……..

    It’s a good day for HIS GPS, “God’s positioning system”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s