Acting As If (Language of Letting Go)

The behavior we call “acting as if” can be a powerful recovery tool. Acting as if is a way to practice the positive. It’s a positive form of pretending. It’s a tool we use to get ourselves unstuck. It’s a tool we make a conscious decision to use. Acting as if can be helpful when a feeling begins to control us. We make a conscious decision to act as if we feel fine and are going to be fine. When a problem plagues us, acting as if can help us get unstuck, We act as if the problem will be or already is solved, so we can go on with our life. Often, acting as if we are detached will set the stage for detachment to come in and take over. There are many areas where acting as if – combined with other recovery principles – will set the stage for the reality we desire. We can act as if we love ourselves, until we actually do begin to care for ourselves. We can act as if we a right to say no, until we believe we do. We don’t pretend we have enough money to cover a check. We don’t pretend an alcoholic is not drinking. We use acting as if as part of our recovery, to set the stage for our new behaviors. We force ourselves through positive recovery behaviors, disregarding our doubts and fears, until our feelings have time to catch up with reality. Acting as if is a positive way to overcome fears, doubts, and low self-esteem. We do not have to lie; we do not have to be dishonest with ourselves. We open up to the positive possibilities of the future, instead of limiting the future by today’s feelings and circumstances. Acting as if helps us get past shaky ground and into solid territory.


6 thoughts on “Acting As If (Language of Letting Go)

  1. Yesterday we posed the question, “Is God Enough for Me?”

    My friend Paul the apostle said something like this:

    Against the spiritual forces of evil, therefore take up the whole armor of God, so that you may be able to withstand on that evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand therefore, and fasten the belt of truth around your waist, and put on the breastplate of righteousness. As shoes for your feet put on whatever will make you ready to proclaim the gospel of peace. With all of these, take the shield of faith, with which you will be able to quench all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
    Pray in the Spirit at all times in every prayer and supplication.– From Ephesians 6

    I’m Harry, grateful alcoholic and devoted twelve stepper.

    • (Matthew 9:6). The real healing for the paralyzed man was the courage to act as if—and then his mind and body followed in step.

  2. I found that when I acted as if, that I actually acted to do the next right thing, or took the next indicated action.
    I didn’t think about it, I did it.
    Thus began the first part of living a new life of freedom…
    Just my experience…which I share with a couple million other people who will be sober for today.
    Grateful for the Gift

  3. Top of the morning family,
    The distance between dreams and reality is called action.
    Self is incapable of willing what is right.
    When I pay attention to what Divine Mercy is doing in my life, I begin to feel who HE is. Today, faith becomes stronger the more I give glory / thanks to Him in all areas of my life. His presence becomes reality when I’m interacting with Him; talking, listening, and watching Him work in my life.

    What are You going to show me today?
    – let me hear what You want me to hear
    – let me feel what You desire me to feel

    It’s a good day to have a good day.

  4. Acting “as if” requires courage. What if I don’t feel courageous when action is needed and I need to act as if? Act as if I have courage. A hero is someone who is afraid but acts as if they are not. Acting as if still requires honesty. I don’t lie to myself that I am not craving if I am. I tell my sponsor I am craving, but I make sure my actions are the actions of someone who is not craving. That attitude of as if works for most situations, especially when I am having trouble with acceptance.

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