Denial is a strong emotion in me.  It kept me “out there” for years and years.  I do not sit in judgment of others, as to whether or not they are alcoholic.  It is up to me to focus on my own issues, problems, and behaviors.  I cannot judge another, and I cannot compare my life to the lives of others.  At meetings I hear others talk about what their experiences were when they were drinking, and I listened closely as I might learn something about the disease of alcoholism, in all it’s forms.  Some of us did drink daily, some of us binge drank, and some of us drank sporadically.  Some of us only drank vodka, and some only wine or beer, and some of us took drugs in a variety of forms.  However I define my drinking, the disease of alcoholism has always been  present in my life.  It can be found in my denial, in my minimizing the damage it did, in the loud justifications of why I drink, and in the rationalizing that enabled me to continue to function in a total state of denial.  I am forever grateful for acceptance, which is the opposite of denial, as I am now living a sober, happy life in recovery.
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