Coming to an understanding that I am not the person I once was feels good.  But it’s not my feelings that I concern myself with, it is the feeling others have toward me.  I ask myself how can I make the amends that is needed and it requires more than “I’m sorry.”  Some of my amends guide me to service in the Fellowship, some guide me to be of service to my community in some way.  I have made verbal amends, written amends, and living amends (my recovery).  Working Steps Eight and Nine have brought me to a clearer picture of my part in my life, and has helped me to identify my character defects and shortcomings.  I think back to a time when I let another take the blame for what I had done.  Or when I accused someone falsely for something I did.  In looking back I can see where I was  selfish, self-centered, envious, dishonest in both word and deed, and time and again acting out of resentment and jealousy.  I had to find the courage to face those I owed an amends to, and to do my part, without regard to the behavior of others.  Amends was about my behavior, alone.

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